Many parents ponder on their roles in their child’s life. What is my role? What part should I play in my child’s life? As in a theater of a child’s life, there are parents on stage. What do they do? Is their role good or bad for their child? All parents strive to play the best role for their children. Whatever good role parents may choose to play, they may appear to be bad actors, unfortunately.
Often parents have to play too many roles, and therefore they act poorly. To raise a child it takes a village, a well known saying teaches us. However, in the modern life a parent has to do it all alone. An ordinary mother tries to be a mommy, a nanny, a caregiver, a cook, a servant, a playmate, a friend, a teacher, a tutor, a planner, a provider, not to mention that, if she is single, she also tries to be a father. It is obviously almost impossible to play all those roles very well. Therefore, there is a piece of advice for parents – play only one role, yours, role of a parent.
What is the role of a parent? It becomes clearer when you think of your own parents and their influence on you as a person. What would be the one thing you want from your parents? Trust. If they trust you they obviously love you. If they trust it means you are worthy of this trust. To trust is to believe in a child’s goodness, know that the child is good. That’s it. If there was only one line written for a parent’s role, that would be “I trust you.“
For happy children, or children in trouble, it will always work for good if you say sincerely, “I trust you.” The most powerful words, which may help a difficult teenager are “I have faith in you, I believe you.” What is the role of a parent? It is to be yourself, don’t try to be someone else, and time to time rehearse this script, “I know you are a good kid. I trust you.” Even if you are not the best actor for other roles, your role of a parent will be accomplished well.
Why is this parenting faith so important? You can be a diligent parent following all advice on how to teach your child, you can even devote to your child all time available, and you still may have fears, which spoil your relationship with your child. And you can be a lousy parent, so busy that you have no time to teach your child anything. Yet, you can still give your child enough confidence by your faith. That is the role of a parent.